Clareified

Years ago, in the absence of a life of my own, I decided I’d follow Karol around because sitting in bars and writing in notebooks struck me as more interesting than whatever I was doing. But now! Now, I’m so stalking Ari.

We bullshit for a few minutes and then I tell her I was actually calling for Evan’s doctorly advice.

“Is he around for a sec?”
“No… he’s been fucking a slut for the past year and I kicked him out. He hasn’t talked to the kids in 6 months. Wanna know why?” Uhm… no. NO. I want to know any more of any of this. I almost want chemo right now because the poison might just burn that last minute or so out of my brain for all eternity and wouldn’t that be nice?

Oh, and how is it possible that while the O.C. season two was the worst piece of crap ever to be aired in the history of television, season three is WORSE?

And um…yeah…so wonder what Ari’s cheating friend is up to?

Maybe Cory had trouble finding a job because when asked to rank, on a scale of one to ten, how important finding a job was, he answered thirteen or fourteen.

Is it wrong that I am spending ninety percent of the time watching this and yelling “where is that child’s mother?’ at my TV?

Marry your baby daddy day? WHAT. THE. MOTHERFUCK?

18 year old with a three year old getting tested for HIV because she continues to have unprotected sex with a man she “doesn’t trust”? Cereal?

“We have found a myriad of ways to enable these women to raise babies by themselves and that is a problem.” - “Expert”
Yes, that’s the problem.

Spike Lee has trouble getting financing? Well, maybe he should make movies that suck less.

Joseph Phillips is so angry…what’s up with that? Did somebody blow through their Cosby Show mobneys?

Sorry Soledad, but if you have to add the words “is a famous rap artist” then he ain’t a famous rap artist. 607? Who on earth is 607?

Is it wrong that while watching Last Comic Standing I expect…um…I don’t know…stand up comedy?

Oh, and while we’re on the subject of TV: The Cleaner with Ben Bratt blows. So does Burn Notice. All Battlestar feature players, please return to the Galatica.

Gossip Girl, on the other hand, is the shizznit.

Estelle Getty dies

Sucks so bad this season.

Why. Was. I. Not. TOLD??! This show rocks…!! You know you love me. XOXO. Was the OC this delicious?

Ok, it is pissing me off just a tad that the parents of the high school teenagers on this show are also younger than I am. WTF?

Somewhere a twelve-year-old Dawn Summers is squealing with delight. Although the line in the story about Genie Francis now running a home repair shop in Maine makes 33-year-old Dawn Summers very sad inside. This woman was not only Laura Spencer, she was Diana Colville! If not queen of daytime in the 80s, at least a Duchess!

Twice in the last week I have been reminded of the tale of Pandora’s box. How the girl released evil, disease, pain, sorrow and misery into the world because she let curiosity get the best of her. But the legend supposedly says that left behind after all the pestilence was hope. Why is that supposed to be a comforting thought? Evil is let loose, but hope is left behind? Why not let the hope out too?

Years ago, when I was a third year associate at First LLP, I was doing document review in one of the windowless conference rooms for which New York law firms are so well known. With about five or six other twenty something attorneys arranged throughout the room, we got to talking about everything and anything. On one of our many long nights of shuffling through paper looking for legal buzzwords, I casually said “so, does anyone die of AIDS anymore?” One of the first years on the team, a middle eastern guy with a goatee, who was actually a few years older than I was, looked straight at me, tilted his head and without missing a beat asked “have you heard of Africa?”
Oh yeeeaaaahhh. I laughed.
Of course people still died from AIDS, but not Americans. Except that’s not true either. Women of color, namely blacks and latinos, in the US are contracting HIV and dying from AIDS in pandemic numbers. The View featured a segment on the subject this morning (and here I will note I was sitting in a waiting room and the TV was tuned to ABC…while I have no trouble confessing to watching hours of Hannah Montana on the Disney network, I will not have my reputation tarnished with the suggestion that I would voluntarily watch the View) The expert doctor, one Dr. Rodriquez, or as Whoopi called him “my good friend” seemed to blame rampant cheating by men of color with other women or men coupled with the wanting of babies by women for the high numbers of infection due to unprotected sex. He also seemed to blame the thoughtlessly selfish Magic Johnson for refusing to die. “People just think it’s not a big deal. It is. AIDS kills.” His eyes seemed to add a bitter “everyone except stupid Magic Johnson. It reminded me of the South Park episode where Cartman contracts the virus while getting his tonsils out and is pissed off because no one comes to his AIDS benefit or will give him any perks. “It’d be one thing if you had cancer, kid,” the airline stewardess says sympathetically, “then maybe we could do something for you.”

I am so stunned by the news of Tim Russert’s death. I loved him when I was younger because he was an openly devout Catholic in the public eye, which was rare for anyone but Kennedys, and all the rarer for a broadcast journalist. During the “Election 2000″ I never missed Meet the Press, not ever.
I also loved that he never let New York politicians forget that New York only has one real NFL team. Stupid Giants.
I’ve grumbled at him in recent months for what I thought was unfair Clinton bashing, but I cannot imagine the next four months of “Election 2008″ without him. Heaven help those who are left with George Stephanopoulos to sort the wheat from the chaff.
Hopefully, he is at peace with God.
My heart goes out to his poor son so close to Father’s Day. My heart breaks imagining the unopened Father’s Day present, he will never get to give.
Life is so very short.