Clareified

Life is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel

“I wish anybody else in the world was here with me but you. Anybody.” -Karol

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratliffe

And as an addendum, let me say that computing while drinking tequila—even worser. Of course, by tequila I mean, lemon flavored vodka because ew, tequila is gross.

Alceste: It’s you against the world.
When did that happen?
Me: I don’t know, but I’m losing.

Wendy: Well, at least I’ll get some sleep if the police bust the place tonight.
Paul: Yeah, in jail.
Wendy: Hey. Sleep is sleep.

Jamie: I was talking to the lead singer of my band, she’s a girl, she said “I just broke up with my boyfriend, he’s a total 68″ Have you guys heard of this?
Jordan: Yeah, it’s like 69, but I owe ya one. There’s also 77, like 69 but you get ate more.

“I hope if I’m ever that gay that I’m happy at least.” -Ari on the recent “nesting” behavior of her friend.

“Look, he’s one of those people that thinks he’s a good guy, but he’s really not.” -G-train

I will not play Scrabble. I don’t care if you did drive all the way down here. Just remember who introduced you to Scrabble. You were a Scrabble nobody till we taught you how to play. -Lola

Tom: What is that?
Me: My TomTom GPS
Jamie: Or as it’s actually called ‘The Poor Man’s Garmin.’