I’ll “The Help” you right in the face
Yes, I’ve seen “The Help.”
I’ve seen “The Help” my entire life.
I saw “The Help” when Whoopi Goldberg was in it with Ray Liotta and I saw “The Help” when Whoopi Goldberg was in it with Doogie Howser M.D. The good white people who treat their coloreds just *like* they were people! And the coloreds sho does loves the chillren too.
Lawd, chile.
VO. MIT.
No doubt I’ll see “The Help 2011.” I watch a lot of movies. It’s a thing with me, but I saw some tweets today, from a woman I actually know in real life and have always had a pleasant online rapport with, that pissed me the FUCK off.
And I quote:
I’m more than a little sad & annoyed @ how The Help is being demonized by people w/an ax to grind & overlooking ANY of its other themes.
Dude.
DUUUUUDDEEEEEE!!! What do you mean “you people”? Er…I mean, people. O_o
Last winter, a white friend of mine, used the phrase “black chip on her shoulder” to dismiss the criticisms a black friend of mine had about a popular British sci-fi show.
GAAWWWDD, you negroes are always complaining about SOMETHING! The Oscars don’t nominate any black people? You complain. We make a hackneyed movie about stereotypical “mammies” in the 60s who are saved by the earnest “good white folk,” a flick GUARANTEED to get nominated, you complain. Jaysus what is it with you people and your axes and chips?!
And I guess since I brought it up, I will tell you. Here’s the problem: the po black folk who need savin’ are the only movies mainstream Hollywood ever tells. I wonder whether the woman who is all saddened by the black people with their axe grinding has seen any other film this year with more than three lead black characters. (And listen, don’t get me started on those movies, but if “The Help” is your *only* “black film” I side-eye you and hard.)
Also, in an environment where leading Republican candidates for President of the United States of America are signing statements that explicitly say that black children were BETTER OFF in slavery, it is up to leading academics, historians and journalists — of ALL RACES — to cut the knees out from under ANY dramatization of slavery or Jim Crow era “stories” that romanticize the degradation of black Americans.
The help didn’t clean houses and wipe the snot of white children because that shit was fun. They did it because that was ALL they were ALLOWED to do. Can you imagine a world where your mother, your grandmother and your daughter ALL had the SAME fate… keeping someone else’s household together for pennies? Cooking food that you’re not allowed to eat for people who you can’t sit next to on the bus? Miss me with the “oh, but these whites were different.” The “different” whites were the ones killed for protesting WITH black people. Just sayin.
And then there’s the white washing of the reality of being a domestic… I can’t for a SECOND imagine a movie being made, about say 1930s Germany, where the gist is that the Jews decided to leave Berlin and all move in together in the Polish countryside. Where, though they had to wear certain clothing and get fun tattoos, they managed to strike up a friendly camaraderie with the German guards and they’d play cards together and give the kind-hearted “good Nazis” advice on child rearing.
FUCK.
OUTTA.
HERE.
And you know what, if they MADE that movie AND I saw it AND LOVED IT, no way IN HELL would I tell Holocaust survivors or their descendants to shut up when they complained that the movie didn’t track with their reality. I would fall the hell back because dude, DUUUUUDDDDEEEEEE.
ARRRGGGGHHHH.
Okay, I’m done. DONE. Just. DONE.
August 11th, 2011 at 10:12 pm
I think you need to get on that “madea gets a cheddar biscuit” script so you can flip this help shit on its head. You see you write it so all the staff at red lobster are white.
Also, I thought you were Hispanic so now I am confused. Were you this mad at La Bamba or the Three Amigos?
August 11th, 2011 at 10:14 pm
Umm, they already made that ridiculous Holocaust movie:
Life Is Beautiful
August 11th, 2011 at 10:18 pm
I LOVED Life is Beautiful! Umm…. uh oh.
August 11th, 2011 at 10:24 pm
I wish they would just once make a movie where the fat guy was the comic relief. Everyone always takes me so seriously. Thanks Brando.
August 11th, 2011 at 10:25 pm
What is the sound of one irony clapping?
August 11th, 2011 at 10:30 pm
My used to be best friend was Jewish, sooo #noraces!
August 12th, 2011 at 12:15 am
And what about your used to be second best friend? Grr
August 12th, 2011 at 1:39 am
When will mainstream Hollywood get on board with the *authentic* black experience? I bet “The Help” doesn’t have a single black man dressed as a fat black woman.
August 12th, 2011 at 4:06 am
Awww *pinches fischel’s jewish cheeks*
August 12th, 2011 at 4:07 am
Listen, RICK, I SAID *NOT* TO GET ME STARTED ON THOSE MOVIES! Nnoooottt
August 12th, 2011 at 4:47 am
Ever see the first movie Whoopi Goldberg did after Color Purple, “Jumpin’ Jack Flash”? Came out in 1986. Saw it at a cheapo theatre’s double bill with “Stand By Me,” which I thought I would love and ended up thinking was a pretentious/morose pile o’ crap.
JJF is a great, funny, patriotic flick.
August 12th, 2011 at 4:50 am
Oh, and as long as we’re on the subject:
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/wthuston/2011/08/11/abc-whitewashes-history-no-cigs-no-whites-only-in-new-early-60s-based-pan-am-tv-series/
August 12th, 2011 at 4:52 am
This is generally considered to be the all-time worst holocaust movie, courtesy of Jerry Lewis:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_day_the_clown_cried
August 12th, 2011 at 6:44 am
Yup. Um…I’ve…er…actually seen every movie whoopi goldberg has ever made. Same is true for halle berry, denzel.washington and morgan freeman. I’m close to being able to say that with sam jackson too… But good lord he makes a lot of crap.
August 12th, 2011 at 8:33 am
Uh Oh. Granny made me promise to take her to see The Help this weekend!
August 12th, 2011 at 8:45 am
LOLZ!! I’m taking my mom for her birthday! #righteousangerFAIL
August 12th, 2011 at 8:46 am
I refuse to pay for it though! I’ll be buying two tickets to Glee 3D!
August 12th, 2011 at 10:13 am
Glee 3D? Is that a horror film? Will people get dismembered? In 3D?
I plan to see Attack the Block this weekend – looks to have more than 3 black leads, but hey, it’s not out of Hollywood.
August 12th, 2011 at 10:36 am
Astin reviewed that on Filmchaw… it did not go well.
August 12th, 2011 at 10:48 am
The movie is getting a lot of hype and thus sets expectations high. However, I never have high hopes for summer movies, as long as it entertains me, it’s a win.
August 12th, 2011 at 10:52 am
True…and he did give Captain America a positive review…plus, he’s canadian. #cantbetrusted
August 12th, 2011 at 11:14 am
Sigh. I used to see movies.
So, I have a slightly more nuanced problem with The Help, and movies of its ilk. I’m disappointed that any “mainstream” movie about a minority experience has to be about that minority experience as seen and understood through a white character’s experience (and usually epiphany). I’m disappointed that we can’t have a movie like The Help, but where the white characters are nothing but extras, and the movie is about the main characters’ actual experience. You know, like The Color of Purple, which did all right at the box office, if I recall.
Think: Glory, Dances With Wolves, all those Whoopi as maid movies, Driving Miss Daisy, etc.
Why does Hollywood assume people need an entree white character? Well, I assume it’s because they’ve done the research, and people don’t go see the movie otherwise, but it’s still disappointing.
Anyhow, The Root had this piece about some black women’s ambivalence about The Help that I think you might like, Dawn: http://www.theroot.com/views/help-wanted-weighing-new-film
Also, Rick is hilarious.
August 12th, 2011 at 11:17 am
Oh, Dr. Shady, you should read that link too — it seems to indicate that it would be acceptable to take your Granny to the film.
August 12th, 2011 at 11:24 am
You are amazing, Dawn. Your righteous indignation hits the mark so often. All good points made by you in this one.
August 12th, 2011 at 12:57 pm
Wait, I LIKED Attack the Block, I just didn’t think it was MEGASUPERAWESOME like the Internets is hyping.
And on the racial scale, I think the black kids were cast well (from my white Canadian standpoint), in that the fact they were black was of about zero importance to their characters, outside of a couple scenes where they were dealing with more stereotypical “gangsta” guys. And yes, gangsta reads about as white as it sounds coming from me.
Anyway, The Help. Are you saying you don’t approve? The message was a bit cloudy in your post.
August 12th, 2011 at 3:42 pm
I refuse to pay for it though! I’ll be buying two tickets to Glee 3D!
LOL. Picturing Grandma leaving the theater thinking: “Wow, I had no idea The Help had so much singing and dancing in it…”
August 13th, 2011 at 4:30 pm
I’m sure I’m misunderstanding something- what do you mean by “more than three black leads?” I’m not sure when I’ve seen a movie that had more than three leads at all.
Re: Sam Jackson’s crap: have you seen Deep Blue Sea? It makes up for all.
Have a good August/ fantasy football season! (Though I may see you IRL, of course.)
August 14th, 2011 at 10:47 am
FWIW, I really enjoyed Attack the Block. I thought the kids were great (and I cared when any of them were killed, unlike most slasher films where you’re rooting for the screaming helpless teen to be killed*), the aliens glow in the dark teeth were scary, and I loved the scenes with Nick Frost and Luke Treadaway. While it’s not super great or very scary, it was definitely a fun summer movie. Certainly the best movie I’ve seen this summer.
*I’m not really a sociopath, I just hate screaming helpless people. Which is why I really don’t watch many slasher films. More a fan of the psychological and supernatural horror films that don’t involve “hmm, what creative way can we use to kill this person now?” kind of killing. I want to be scared, not grossed out.
August 14th, 2011 at 8:48 pm
I saw ‘The Help’ this weekend, and while “Honey Chile” isn’t in the script, “Lawd, I loves me some fried chicken” is.
I was the only one in the theater who burst out laughing when she said it. Thanks!