Over the past year or so, there has been a lot of talk here on clareified.com about ending relationships; friends lost, lovers dismissed, or people just kicked to the curb for a number of minor and/or major offenses. I’m not calling out any one specific thing, just the general sense of ease most people seem to have on terminating relationships.
I have, for the most part, kept my thoughts to myself on these matters. Mostly, because I guess I just don’t agree with everyone else. Or, maybe I choose my friends better than other people. Or, maybe I’m just a sucker. I don’t know.
I used to be like Dawn and some of her readers. Cross me, and I was done with you. Either you ceased to exist to me, or I would get filled with indignant wrath. Usually both. I spent a lot of years living like that.
It’s not worth it.
Some might say, “I don’t get angry, I just remove people from my life.” It’s never that easy, and I think that Monkey Paw wine speaks to that argument.
The fact is, people make mistakes. Sometimes lots of them. Sometimes I do it too. For the most part, I don’t think people do these things out of malice. They do it out of ignorance. They do it to protect themselves. They do it for many reasons. It doesn’t mean it’s right, but I’m pretty sure it’s not malicious.
I don’t mean to say that you should keep people in your life that constantly hurt you. No one should do that. But, I find myself giving people lots more chances theses days and trying to understand others’ perspectives.
Though I no longer just cut people off, I certainly have friends and past lovers that I have drifted apart from for various reasons. Often that’s ok, and occasionally it really sucks. They say that time heals all wounds. Sometimes they are wrong. Some wounds never heal, they just become a part of you. Most of my wounds of that nature have to do with relationships lost. And though they are wounds, they are wounds of the best kind. The kind that represents what was lost, but never forgotten.
The following poem speaks to that.
MORE STRONG THAN TIME
Victor Hugo (1802-1885)
Since I have set my lips to your full cup, my sweet,
Since I my pallid face between your hands have laid,
Since I have known your soul, and all the bloom of it,
And all the perfume rare, now buried in the shade;
Since it was given to me to hear on happy while,
The words wherein your heart spoke all its mysteries,
Since I have seen you weep, and since I have seen you smile,
Your lips upon my lips, and your eyes upon my eyes;
Since I have known above my forehead glance and gleam,
A ray, a single ray, of your star, veiled always,
Since I have felt the fall, upon my lifetime’s stream,
Of one rose petal plucked from the roses of your days;
I now am bold to say to the swift changing hours,
Pass, pass upon your way, for I grow never old,
Fleet to the dark abysm with all your fading flowers,
One rose that none may pluck, within my heart I hold.
Your flying wings may smite, but they can never spill
The cup fulfilled of love, from which my lips are wet;
My heart has far more fire than you can frost to chill,
My soul more love than you can make my soul forget
VinNay is my first guest poetry blogger who ever did it twice! I didn’t even threaten him with violence!