Now I know how McCain felt
Ok, it was one thing when Dawn Summers started getting mail. Then signing up for magazine subscriptions. But now she wants to learn to play hockey! I can only imagine this is her attempt to get rid of me, as a real world physical being, once and for all, so she can be completely in charge. You can’t have dogs delivered to a physical address via the internet, can you?
Oh, and speaking of hockey: I got a disturbing email from pearatty saying “Yay Canada! Suck it, US hockey team.” Now, I haven’t studied family law in some time, but it is illegal for a Canadian to raise the future starting quarterback of the New England Patriots, isn’t it? (Check out the grip Wygant’s already rocking: 
)
We can’t have him going to the CFL and talking about “third and final down”!
Who do I speak to about this? This has GOT to be a threat to national security. Can I call child protective services?