The first life fail story of 2010
I had a job interview yesterday. I thought it went terribly, however, I’ve been informed that I got a callback, so goes to show what I know.
Part of the reason I thought it went badly was because very shortly after the interview started, this guy starts asking me about the geopolitical ramifications of the U.S.’ Debt to China.
I know, right?
And no, I wasn’t applying for Secretary of Homeland Security.
Once I got through that conversation, he asks me what I did for fun.
“Play competitive Scrabble” is my go-to response and usually results in an opportunity to chat about how so and so’s wife is amazing at Scrabble or how one time, he swallowed a tile because he was hiding the blank under his tongue to teach his sister a lesson. True story.
This guy, however, could not have been less interested.
“Hmm. You reading anything?”
“Um. Yeah, I just started a novel called the Grand Prairie Rabbit Festival.”
“Huh. What’s it about?”
“Um. So far…a disillusioned priest in Lousiana, who gets assigned to a crappy parish in the sticks.”
“Is he a pedophile?”
“No. I don’t think so.”
“Ok…anything else?”
“About the book?”
“No, do you do anything else for fun?”
Oh, you mean besides talk to you? Cause this, Sir, has been Fan-Tastic!
I didn’t say that last part.
Oh! But, um (shout out to HIMYM fans) in case you were wondering: the geopolitical ramifications of our debt to China are “troubling.”
You’re welcome.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:00 pm
Oh dear. Sounds obnoxious.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:01 pm
The first life fail story comment of 2010! Oh the pressure…
I feel like the universe of people interested in Scrabble is even smaller than the universe of people interested in poker. We need to brainstorm up a new go-to response.
“I’m an insufferable bandwagon New England Patriots fan.”
“I tell people amusing stories about my mother.”
“I purchase luxury cars and then drive them places the subway could take me.”
“CUPCAKES!”
Eh, on second thought, stick with “competitive Scrabble.”
January 20th, 2010 at 4:02 pm
Dammit! Petitedov beat me to the punch by a minute. #fail #epicfail #lifefail #facepalm
January 20th, 2010 at 4:03 pm
I hate you. And your little cat too.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
leave jade out of this!
January 20th, 2010 at 4:24 pm
I’ve got some promotional post cards of the book I can give to you while you’re doing these job interviews.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:31 pm
Quiet you. Your next book needs to be about the feasibility of American style democracy in the Middle East.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:31 pm
Kaz, who or what is Jade? I only know a tickytack.
January 20th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
Jade is F-Train’s stripper name, didn’t you know?
: )
January 20th, 2010 at 4:47 pm
The stripper routine that is regularly met with cries of “put it back on! Put it all back on.”?
January 20th, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Actually I choose my customers carefully. If we’ve gotten to the point where clothes are coming off, she wants them off.
And now you can scrub your eyeballs with bleach. Wingow!
January 20th, 2010 at 5:03 pm
Wingow = Dawn Summers referring to F-Train’s cat by the name I gave her, not the stripper name F-Train gave her.
(Oh, FYI, it’s spelled Tikky Tak.)
Awesomeness.
January 20th, 2010 at 5:13 pm
“See how often I can get banned from somewhere for being racist”
“Demanding cross-border cake”
“Eating at Fridays, but not the Canadian one.”
January 20th, 2010 at 6:00 pm
I didn’t give the cat her stripper name. My stripper ex-girlfriend named the cat.
January 20th, 2010 at 11:29 pm
Um, since my comment was 1,000 times less funnier than F-train, I feel like he should have the honors.
January 20th, 2010 at 11:56 pm
Nope. What is this affirmative action commenting?
January 21st, 2010 at 2:55 pm
How is this a fail if you got a callback?