I am now a HUGE college basketball fan and my FAVORITE team is MSU! Which Alceste tells me stands for Michigan State University. Now, I’ve gotta learn which team we MSUans really hate. I’m hoping it’s Syracuse or Maryland, cause those basketball teams really SUCK! And MSU is WAY better thanks to my brother D. Summers who scored a season high 24 points yesterday.
Better recognize.
Dear Brady Zac Wynstan,
Yes, I was the one who wanted to name you Brady Zac. Your parents, however, probably figured your innate awesome wonderfulness would be quite enough without actually naming you Awesome Wonderfulness, which is pretty much what Brady Zac is. At least, I’m not the aunt that tried to name you Joaquin! (I KNOW, RIGHT??! *shaking our heads in unison, once you learn to shake your head… um and read parenthetical instructions*)
HI!!! Happy Birthday!!
So many things for you to learn commenting, tweeting, cheering for the Patriots…oh, and don’t worry, I will teach you how to glare at people who put an i in your damn hell ass name where it doesn’t belong.
Oh, whoops.
I probably shouldn’t have said damn hell or ass. Well…or this might be the perfect opportunity to teach you the “if it’s in the bible, it’s not a curse,” rule. Cause that is totally the rule.
Trust me, I’m a lawyer.
Welcome!
Love,
Dawn
P.S. By the way, young man, do you know how long I labored through your delivery? The emails, the blog posts, the texts, the tweets…for like NINETEEN HOURS! I. AM. EXHAUSTED. I only mention it, in case you haven’t commented on my blogs lately. Aww, but look at you, how cuuttee aare you and moommmmyy:
I feel like those weathermen on local news stations who get the populace all in a tizzy about a big storm and come 6:00 and there’s no snow anywhere.
But undaunted they face the cameras and promise
THERE WILL BE A BABY!!!
Not now, apparently. BUT ANY MINUTE NOW! BABIES WILL BE RAINING DOWN ON THE TRI-STATE AREA!
Or something.
I like that pearatty will likely not see any of these posts until 17 years from now when Brady Zac is all packed off to Yale and she and his daddy, the then-Governor of Arizona finally have time to read blogs again.
*waves to pearatty and Governor Pearatty of the future*
Hey! That means you too. Close ‘em.
Good.
Ok, um, wow. Is it just me or is the President of the United States a moron?
Actually, it can’t just be me. I’m watching this live town hall on CNN and somewhere between his “why would an employer hire a guy who’s been to jail when unemployment’s at 10% and he can hire a guy who hasn’t been to jail? Who’s just been laid off?” And his “yeah, I had to pay that 10% penalty too. Whoa. It’s no fun” I decided it must actually be a prerequisite for the office.
Like if you’re stupid enough to want this job, well, yep, you’re stupid.
Good grief!
And why for the love of everything holy, is he *stumping* WITH Joe Biden the day after the State of the Union???
Biden is NOT an asset. Extemporaneous speaking is NOT his forte.
President chillin in Flo-Ridah is NOT a good look when the rest of us are freezing our asses off.
Somebody needs to be smacked upside the head.
Um. Okay, rant over. Somebody let the bad people open their eyes again.
14 hours. Still no baby.
Oh, but mama may need epidural rehab tomorrow.
*Worst titled post. Ever.
Send all your good vibes Westward this morning as my first fake nephew of 2010 makes his way to the world. Via stork and/or Santa Claus as it was explained to me. Don’t know what pearatty’s bitching about.
How bad are things when progress on gay rights is the safe feel-good option?
I saw this poem on a bus a long time ago. It was short and I memorized it. But since I never studied it in school or anything, I don’t have any profound thoughts about it. But, somehow, it fits my mood today.
The Blue Boat by Kathleen Jamie
How late the daylight edges
toward the northern night
as though journeying
in a blue boat, gilded in mussel shell
with, slung from its mast, a lantern
like our old idea of the soul
No one is hereafter allowed to send Dawn Summers cupcakes, candy or cookies. She is only allowed fruits, vegetables and damn hell ass exercise videos. That is all.