Alas, that you are inconveniently located in Arizona, means that I couldn’t make it in person. Doubly worrisome because it appears that your hippie Aunt Smokey has been calling you Cletus the Fetus and that just will not stand! Arizona’s most famous and influential citizen will not be saddled with the name Cletus!! Despite the fact that it rhymes and who doesn’t like a good rhyme…huh…what? I lost my train of thought.
Oh, right… Brady Zac!
I hope you’re well and growing stronger each day. I understand you’re not technically due until February, but personally, I think it’ll fun and awesome if you were born on Martin Luther King day. You’ll get why this is so funny when I tell you the story about the only state in the union that turned down a day off because it was for a black man! (Ha ha, even funnier, the look on your mom’s face as I tell said story and the indignant tone in which she will protest Arizona’s racist reputation! So excited to meet you!) Also, if you are born on Martin Luther King day, that’ll mean no more rhyming with Cletus just that sooner! Cletus. Sheesh. Has a Cletus ever lead an NFL franchise to the Lombardi trophy? NO! Anyhoo. Hi, Brady Zac! Enthusiastic wave!
Oh yeah, Brady Zac’s carrier human, pearatty, has thoughtfully requested that in lieu of gifts, donations be made to a charity to help other pregnant persons and their cletus fetuses. (Not that Brady Zac is a Cletus in any way!)
So, if you were looking for someplace to give money to before the end of the year, I hope you’ll consider this very worthy cause. Here’s a bit more from the mama to be herself:
As people keep asking me what I want for my birthday and Christmas, I have come to realize that I don’t really need anything. I have such a great family, wonderful friends, a good job, a nice house, etc. I know you’ll all be there when I do need something, so why use up your goodwill now?
In the meantime, if you really want to spend money on me this season, how about a donation here: http://www.fistulafoundation.org/. If you don’t know what fistula is, it’s a gross but easily surgically remedied condition caused by childbirth complications. Women in very poor areas who can’t afford the surgery are often cast out by their families and made pariahs. They could use your money a lot more than I can.
Here’s a little rundown of the charity itelf.