And the winners should be…
Unless somebody wants me to hurt my TV. My choices (and witty commentary) are in bold, below the fold. In other news, I think I may be over TV. My DVRs are full again (unwatched Weeds, PADs, My Boys’, Harper’s Island, King of the Hills,’ etc.) Alceste told me there was a good new Better off Ted and yet, I still went out to play poker and then twittered for two hours when I got home instead of watching…perhaps if TV had more of *me* on it…
List of Major Categories:
Outstanding Comedy Series
Family Guy
30 Rock
Weeds (GARBAGE with a french accent)
How I Met Your Mother
The Office (The Joe Biden of television shows)
Flight of the Conchords (quirky with a New Zealand accent.)
Entourage (Garbage with a Brooklyn accent.)
Outstanding Drama Series
Mad Men (SUCKS TOO)
Breaking Bad (SUCKS)
Lost (Craptacular)
Damages (SUCKS MORE)
Dexter (SUPER SUCKS)
Big Love (SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS (get it, cause he has three wives?))
House (Hmm…and the winner is…)
Lead Actor in a Drama
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Hugh Laurie, House
Gabriel Byrne, In Treatment
Michael C. Hall, Dexter
Jon Hamm, Mad Men
Simon Baker, The Mentalist
Lead Actress in a Drama
Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men
Glenn Close, Damages
Sally Field, Brothers and Sisters
Mariska Hargitay, Law and Order: SVU (Uh, least bad of BAD choices. OK, I wouldn’t vomit if Glenn Close won, BUT THAT SHOW SUCKS!)
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer
Holly Hunter, Saving Grace
Lead Actor in a Comedy
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Steve Carell, The Office (WHY THE HELL IS HE STILL GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Charlie Sheen, Two and a Half Men
Tony Shalhoub, Monk (WHY THE HELL IS HE STILL GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Jemaine Clement, Flight of the Conchords
Lead Actress in a Comedy
Toni Collette, United States of Tara
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine (WHY THE HELL IS SHE GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Sarah Silverman, The Sarah Silverman Program
Mary-Louise Parker, Weeds (WHY THE HELL IS SHE STILL GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Christina Applegate, Samantha Who?
Best Reality Competition
The Amazing Race
American Idol
Dancing With the Stars (No clue, really, but L’il Kim was on this and I like her.)
Project Runway
Top Chef
Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
The Colbert Report
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart (Uh…I guess?)
Late Show With David Letterman
Real Time With Bill Maher
Saturday Night Live
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
William Shatner, Boston Legal (WHY THE HELL IS HE STILL GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Christian Clemenson, Boston Legal
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
William Hurt, Damages
Michael Emerson, Lost (Who is this? I pick him by default since I don’t know for sure he sucks)
John Slattery, Mad Men
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Rose Byrne, Damages
Sandra Oh, Grey’s Anatomy
Chandra Wilson, Grey’s Anatomy (Seriously, I WILL BREAK TVS if she doesn’t get it this year!!!!! If you aren’t scared YOU AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION!!)
Dianne Wiest, In Treatment
Hope Davis, In Treatment
Cherry Jones, 24 (VOMIT! SUCKS!)
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Kevin Dillon, Entourage
Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your Mother (LEGENDARY! LIKE ME!)
Rainn Wilson, The Office (Would it be wrong it I tweeted rainn that he should just drop out now? Defeat with dignity.)
Tracy Morgan, 30 Rock (Aww…um…can there be a tie?)
Jack McBrayer, 30 Rock
Jon Cryer, Two and a Half Men (WHY THE HELL IS HE STILL GETTING NOMINATED FOR THIS CRAP???!!)
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Kristin Chenoweth, Pushing Daisies
Amy Poehler, Saturday Night Live
Kristin Wiig, Saturday Night Live
Jane Krakowski, 30 Rock
Vanessa Williams, Ugly Betty (And NO, it’s not because she is the most black of the choices. Racists.)
Elizabeth Perkins, Weeds
July 16th, 2009 at 12:11 pm
Soooo, You DON’T like the Office… and apparently want to see a three-way with Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, and Hugh Laurie on the set of Thirty Rock!
That’s HOT!!!!
July 16th, 2009 at 12:15 pm
Uh…that would sorta be hot. Just sayin.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
Mad Men and Breaking Bad do NOT suck. House on the other hand is so freakin predictable.
Kristin Wiig, Saturday Night Live should win best supporting comedy role.
Chandra Wilson (rolling my eyes) – I mean I haven’t seen that show in years but all I recall is her either being pissy with attitude or disappointed with attitude. No range what so ever.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
Pdov – you AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION!!! You should be scared. I don’t know about what.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Oh, and what does “The Office” as Joe Biden mean? I’ll assume it’s either “perpetual also-ran” or “incoherent”.
Also, I’m literally shocked that “Two and a Half Men” is still on the air. Well, maybe not literally. But I haven’t seen any evidence of that show’s existence in at least five years.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Mad Men and Breaking Bad do NOT suck. House on the other hand is so freakin predictable. Good thing Clareified readers know about that “don’t trust Russians” rule. And yes, House is predictable. It won by virtue of the competition ALL SUCKING!!!
July 16th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Yaron is funny, even when he is making fun of me.
Dawn – taste and trust are 2 different things.
July 16th, 2009 at 1:42 pm
But Pdov, we have the same tastes!
-sisterhood of Kelly Clarkson represent!
July 16th, 2009 at 1:52 pm
Yaron, it’s the #1 comedy on network TV (and the only comedy in the top 20) — I am not a fan, but it’s probably the best of the broad-based comedies out there
Dawn: Michael emerson plays Ben Linus. And I share your displeasure with the voters’ love of Weeds and Entourage — did they actually watch the shows last year?
July 16th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
What!? Two and a half men is a top 20 show????? Good lord! How do i not have a tv show yet??? Stupid laziness. #shakefist.
And Yaron, it means: eh, it grew on me, I used to like it, now it’s annoying and I want it to go away and shuttupa his face.
July 16th, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Alceste,
Oh, I like Ben Linus. Okay, I chose well.
July 16th, 2009 at 2:38 pm
Oh, I get it. In that case, I’d prefer you use “the Mike Bloomberg of television shows”.
Alceste – good lord, I had no idea. Wow.
July 16th, 2009 at 2:42 pm
Dude, have you seen the top 20? It’s filled with reality, CSI’s, various CBS dramaas (two of which were canceled) and a couple ABC shows. Two and a half men may be the third “best” show of the whole lot (behind NCIS and maybe the Mentalist).
July 16th, 2009 at 2:52 pm
which dramas were cancelled? Man, my random no CBS/no reality programming policies really have me out of the Tv loop!
July 16th, 2009 at 2:57 pm
I believe Without a Trace and Eleventh Hour were both canceled as being too expensive despite fairly high ratings and winning their time slots (and how weird is it that CBS is the one canceling popular shows? who would have thought?)
July 16th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
speaking of weird, it’s very un-Dawn Summers like of you to be using what was the British spelling of canceled…
July 16th, 2009 at 4:44 pm
It’s not un-Dawn Summers like if you just consider it a typo.
July 16th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Dexter is awesome, and I really liked the Shat on the few episodes I’ve seen of Boston Legal (a show that is otherwise garbage with a Boston accent). Well, actually, they didn’t even have any Boston accents on the show.
July 16th, 2009 at 5:58 pm
I see some blogs criticizing the 6th indication of Mariska. As the actress was guilty of having both talento.Aà Mariska! You simply fantástica.E at least, even if you do not win, will adorn the red carpet.