The price of fame

So funny story. I’m chatting with this girl I went to high school with and she’s all “okay, I’m going to teach you stuff about twitter.” And I’m all, no dude, if I’ve said it once, I’ve said a million times Dawn Summers doesn’t twitter.
So Karol is all “yes, you do.”
And I’m all “no, I don’t.”
And she’s all “Yes, you do.”
And I’m all “no, I don’t.”
You get the idea.
Anyway, she sends me a link to twitter/dawnsummers and is like “yes you do.”
I click it and see that someone has been “go riots” “trying to figure out how to get this on my blackberry” and positing that maybe the Illinois Governor should “give the seat the Oprah!” (which, heh, that’s funny.)
Only problem is said person is NOT ME! It’s not…though I should have stolen that Oprah line…it’s only fair seeing as they’ve stolen me!
Karol started writing back to this person and they responded for a while, but ultimately ended the conversation with the line “I have too much TV to watch to keep arguing with you. I have two words for you Key Lime PIE.”
Now, at first I thought this person made a crucial error, everyone knows Key Lime PIE is THREE words, but then I realized that my inability to count is known worldwide, plus, everyone knows that I would watch TV and love the Key lime pie! Foiled again by my cyber doppleganger.
Anyway, Karol and I, who always love a good mystery, have compiled a list of suspects. We started with Peter, since as an admitted donut stealer we know he is capable of theft.
“Hello, Peetttteeerrr.”
“Heellloo, Daaawwwwnnnn.”
Karol explains the situation and says that we thought the key lime pie line sounded like him. He seemed offended.
“That’s not something I would say!”
“Well, no not exactly, I guess you’d say something about donuts…but if you were imitating Dawn…”
He denied it and went to the fake twitter stream. “No, I didn’t do it, but it’s funny. Are you sure it isn’t Dawn?”
“No, I’m not actually. I taught her how to do the @ thing when I still thought it was her and then the “fake her” started using the @ thing.”
“Hey! I hear those airquotes, missy! IT’S NOT ME!!! Check my facebook status! IT’S NOT.”
“It might be her,” Karol says.
“NO!!!”
Anyway, we hang up with Peter and return to the drawing board. In order we think it might be
Vinnay
Fisch
Jordan
BG
Jamie
F-train
Alceste
Dawn Eden
Pearatty
Dawn (again, I don’t think it’s me and I stand by that.)
Jake (that one was Peter…actually Alceste and Dawn Eden were also Peter)
Karol (that’s right, I’m adding Karol to the list.)

33 Responses to “The price of fame”

  1. Karol Says:

    “Anyway, Karol and I, who always love a good mystery”

    …and who have nothing better to do…

  2. Karol Says:

    I do not think it’s most of that list. I think only one or two are possible and they are both male poker players. Or Dawn, it might be Dawn.

  3. Dawn Summers Says:

    IT’S NOT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, BLYAT.

  4. April Says:

    You list needs to be narrowed down to people who read my blog. Therefore, I suspect Chilly.

  5. VinNay Says:

    I sooooo wish I thought of this, but it isn’t me. But this is something I would totally do and I am honored to be suspect number 1.

  6. Dawn Summers Says:

    Yes! Chilly! Oh I totally should have suspected him!

  7. Karol Says:

    Oh it’s totally Chilly! And you really were #1, Vinnay.

  8. Karol Says:

    Some copying my totally totally Chilly comment.

  9. Dawn Summers Says:

    English, motherfucker, do you speak it?

  10. Chilly Says:

    Its not me. But I do think this is funny. Oh, and I don’t read Thisisnotapokerblog.

  11. April Says:

    Todd has now been threatened. I’m calling in the Feds. Someone is going down.

  12. Heather Says:

    It’s got to be Blagoyavich!!

  13. Pearatty Says:

    Pearatty doesn’t twitter. Actually, I’m even thinking of taking down my Facebook page. It’s too much pressure.

  14. Yaron Says:

    What, I’m not a suspect? FUCK YOU

  15. Jamie Says:

    I seriously wish I was this clever. But, alas, it can’t be me simply because I don’t have Twittering capabilities during work hours. My company blocks my ability to even post to my blog during work hours and my phone is well known not to be able to *text* let alone Twitter.

    {Sigh} Too bad though. I’d like to give whoever is doing this a big round of applause.

  16. Dawn Summers Says:

    Sheesh Yaron! Well, you’re a suspect now!

  17. Petitedov Says:

    Peter really? The dude refuses to get a facebook page let alone twitter. But this is pretty hilarious.

  18. fisch Says:

    maybe it was mataik

  19. Karol Says:

    maybe it was mataik

    That’s what we were saying.

  20. fisch Says:

    Too bad life doesnt have series finalle’s where all the answers are revealed.

  21. Dawn Summers Says:

    hahahahaha dude, tv shows don’t even have those anymore.

  22. fisch Says:

    You can’t edit your comments to make yourself look sharper.
    That should be 2 separate comments.

  23. Dawn Summers Says:

    hahahaha. my blog. my rules. what happened to your rolling limits?

  24. fisch Says:

    They rolled. Look it up.

  25. Yaron Says:

    Thanks, Dawn, much better. That really means a lot to me.

  26. Peter Says:

    I did not steal those doughnuts! You gave them to me and I accepted.

    And lest Jake, Alceste, and the other Dawn think I was accusing them, I was just brainstorming and named the first of Dawn’s blog friends I could think of.

  27. Dawn Summers Says:

    No problem, Yaron. Anytime.

    Peter, then why is your name “Peter doughnut stealer” and not “Peter doughnut accepter”?

  28. Dawn Summers Says:

    By the way, pearatty, you should probably check your wall and send your thank you messages. I think Kearns is about to cry.

  29. KJ Says:

    What, I’m not a suspect? FUCK YOU
    …and the black guy is also not on the suspect list. Really? I blame Obama for being left out. Plus, FUCK YOU.

  30. Dawn Summers Says:

    It’s Obama’s America now. Only white people are suspects. Although, Fisch suspected you, if that makes you feel better.

  31. Jordan Says:

    A little late to the party but…

    Damn, I wish it was me. It isn’t. My guess is that Dawn has split personality and when she thinks she is sleeping, she is actually Twittering and organizing her Fight/Scrabble Club.

  32. Dawn Eden Says:

    It wasn’t me!

  33. Dorian Davis Says:

    You suspected Dawn Eden? Really? She won’t even use Facebook!

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