Clareified

Where does the good go

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PARTY, LISA


HAPPY BIRTHDAY PARTY, LISA

Yesterday, Karol said that Techorati handed out buttons saying “I’m Blogging This!” to the hardy folks on “blogger’s row” at the Convention.
When I asked why, she said:
“you know, it’s like a blogger phrase: “ooh, I’m blogging this.”
Hmm, I think “Don’t blog this” is much more common.
But at Lisa’s birthday, I actually found myself thinking “I’m so blogging that.” I even had the notebook to prove it. (When I started jotting notes, Jessica said I looked like a Kindergarten teacher. And to ensure that there was no misunderstanding, Ari explained that it was because I am frumpy and spinster-like.)
By the way, Ari’s real name is actually “Eri.” She’s such a self-hater.
Lisa picked out a terrific little restaurant on the Upper East side.
The house speciality was fondue and the drink du noir (ooh, I totally just made that up…time to add “working knowledge of French” to the resume) was the all you can drink Sangria.
The place had a swanky vibe about it and most of the light came from the critically acclaimed Bollywood film “Kama Sutra” flickering on the back wall.
The sound was off and there were no subtitles, so it was virtually impossible to figure out what all the naked women rolling around on the bed with undressed men had to do with the lamp that was in desperate need of replacement.
I caught only a couple of uncovered boobs before looking away in horror, but thankfully Peter had seen this movie a number of times before and was able to explain what was happening in each scene.
Somewhere around the third glass of Sangria, I led a round of ‘Happy Birthday,’ ably accompanied by Candace. Then there was some cheerleading that I think spelled L-I-M-A. But it left me I wondering why all the fuss about a bean? Lisa too seemed a bit confused by the whole thing, refused to dance on the table and hastily beat a retreat for the other side of the room.
Then, somebody started singing 50 cent’s “Go shorty, it’s yo berfday.”
Yep, it’s not a party until a drunk white girl starts bustin’ rhyme.
I, on the other hand, was locked in my own epic struggle with the waitress.
Let me be clear, it wasn’t really about how much Sangria I could drink. I learned that after a week in Spain on Christmas vacation. No, it was about getting each glass to cost as little as possible. Could I make it down to a dollar each? Or maybe even cents per glass.
Muhahahahaha.
Oh, they would rue the day.
But Lisa beat me to the punch…er…Sangria, and polished off the jar before I had finished my fourth glass.
Being the birthday girl has its privileges.
The usual suspects of bloggers from bloggerpolooza were on hand, joined by Ivan and Yaron.

So of course, there were the quintessential blogger moments.

“Hi, I’m Yaron”
Candace squealing: “oooh, you’re daily lunch!”

Followed by Jessica introducing Yaron to Esther.
“I think you guys link to each other.”

Karol was notably absent.

Thankfully, Ari, er..Eri easily stepped into the role of threatening to kill me and telling me I dressed funny. Candace taught everyone the universal hand sign for “studying Russian” (think snoopy dance fingers, except pointed down as if hunting and pecking keys on a typewriter.) And Esther explained what the hell was going on in Donnie Darko.
Oh and thanks to Funnya, I now have a new career option: being the lady at the passport office that gets to rename little immigrant kids. Girls will be called Stephanie (spelled in a variety of ways, as to avoid confusion) and boys will be Ephram, regardless of what their “native-land” names were.
Muhahahaha.
As always I managed to belt out a few eighties songs and do my little dance.
Oh, FYI if you’re ever starving in the desert and need fondue, Don’t. Ask. Peter.

10 Responses to “HAPPY BIRTHDAY PARTY, LISA”

  1. Ari Says:

    Eri??!! Dammit… I don’t even “get it”…

  2. Esther Says:

    Enjoyed rocking out with you guys, all in the name of homage to the Smurfette. “Let’s hear it for my baby!!”

  3. dawn Says:

    Well Schmari, your name doesn’t start with an ‘A’ it starts with an ‘E’.

  4. Yaron Says:

    it was virtually impossible to figure out what all the naked women rolling around on the bed with undressed men had to do with the lamp that was in desperate need of replacement.

    My guess is the lamp just couldn’t handle all the hot tantric action… I could be wrong.

  5. candace Says:

    I would love you so much if Karol’s hate wasn’t rubbing off on me. This is a very confused relationship.

  6. Jessica Says:

    …thankfully Peter had seen this movie a number of times before and was able to explain what was happening in each scene

    For the record, Peter hardly sees movies more than once. Says a little something about karol’s mystery man, no?

    Also for the record, the kindergarten teacher reference was because it looked like you were writing down the names of all the rowdy students in your little preparation book.

    okay, and maybe because of the teacher-esque dress you were wearing.

  7. lisa Says:

    fabulous synopsis!

  8. kaz Says:

    hee. did you mean drink de nuit?

  9. Dawn Summers Says:

    oh, not so much with the working knowledge, eh?

  10. Hi there Says:

    Are you there?

    Nice speech. I’m curious how it went over.

Leave a Reply